What Kinds of Games are You Playing?

There are at least two kinds of games: Finite and Infinite Games. This is a book by James P. Carse which was recommended to me by Mike Wagner. It is also the perfect tool to introduce some link love of my own as we look at some applications of the material and concepts to social media.

Thanks go to Paul McEnany for introducing the idea and to Roger von Oech for picking up on it so elegantly.

In the book, Carse talks about a vision of life as play and possibility and I think both words apply to our daily interaction, even the ones online.

Some definitions

A finite game is played for the purpose of winning; an infinite game for the purpose of continuing the play.

The rules of the finite game may not change; the rules of the infinite game must change.

Finite players play within boundaries; infinite players play with boundaries.

Finite players are serious; infinite games are playful.

A finite player plays to be powerful; an infinite player generates time.

The finite player aims for eternal life; the infinite player aims for eternal birth.

As the author says -- the choice is yours.

Nuggets of wisdom

"Because infinite players prepare themselves to be surprised by the future, they play in complete openness as in vulnerability. It is not a matter of exposing one's unchanging identity, the true self that has always been, but a way of exposing one's ceaseless growth, the dynamic self that has yet to be."

"Education leads toward a continuing self-discovery; training leads toward a final self-definition."

"Titles are given at the end of a play, names at the beginning. [...] Titles are abstractions; names are always concrete."

"Power is concerned with what has already happened; strength with what has yet to happen. [...] Power is finite in amount. Strength cannot be measured."

Applications to Social Media

As we all go about our writing and interactions with social media tools, we are in fact collaborating on sharing information and knowledge *and* on our growth as well as the growth of others. We post a series of thoughts and we allow others to come in and inform our thinking with their comments.

Would you consider this learning education or training? It may seem an easy question when in fact it requires a little bit of thinking. The posts that give me most are the ones that open a new door for me, a new way of looking at things. Top ten or five or three lists, the darlings of blogs, are fine on a short term basis to exchange information about how to do things.

When we started publishing online we chose a name for our blogs. Indeed, names are given at the beginning of infinite play, regardless of how long we decide to go on with our work and collaboration online.

And we come to my favorite topic of strength vs. power. Marcus Buckingham talks about us living in a remedial world. If you think about it, we are almost obsessed with fixing the weaknesses we discover. We start that in school with the red marks, we continue it at work with the performance appraisal. We are hired on because of our strengths, yet as time passes, we are evaluated against our weakest points. Why?

The reality is that as we grow, we become more of who we already are -- that is also true online with our voice and presence. And we grow most in the areas of our greatest strength. If you dig a little deeper in this jewel of a book, you will discover that we are strong because we allow others to do what they wish in the course of our play with them. A great team member volunteers his strength to the team most of the time.

Are blogs places where we can showcase our strengths? What about power? Power, writes Carse, is measured in units of comparison. It is a term of competition: how much resistance can we overcome relative to others? This is worth pondering as we strive to establish professional credibility online.

We do many things right in this environment, including the famous Z-list created by Mack Collier at the Viral Garden (thank you, Mack for adding the link to your blogroll), and spread by Gavin Heaton at Servant of Chaos with the help of many, including Drew McLellan who put Conversation Agent on the list.

Regardless of what kind of games you are playing, no one can play a game alone. We are who we are relating to others who are also who they are in relationship with others. This is the fabric on which life is built upon and so is social media. Our lives are fluid. To say it with Carse in a Zen image: we are not the stones over which the stream of the world flows; we are the stream itself.

I know, I know I've given you another brain workout. Thank you all linked here for reading, for posting comments, for passing by, for getting to know each other or for coming here for the first time.

[image by Clarita on Morguefile]

Comments

[Thomas R. Clifford]

Hi Valeria,

I love your question, "Are blogs places where we can showcase our strengths? What about power?"

Yes, blogs do showcase our strengths but I personally see blogs as a tool to "showcase our gifts." Sure, some may see it as "power" or "strengths." But let's not forget about our "gifts," those natural abilities we were all born with. I think that's the "power" of personal blogs.

I have not heard of the Carse book but look forward to reading it.

Thanks for another thought-provoking post!

[Michael Wagner]

Valeria,

I love your application of Carse to this social media world we are forming and being formed by.

Thanks for reading and sharing what you Carse's book birthed in you.

It does feel good to recommend a book and see how your thoughts make my understanding of the same book all the deeper and applicable.

Keep creating...a future of surprise,
Mike

[Roger Anderson]

What an interesting game you play with links and logic all at the same time. This post was also a bit more work than the usual.

Thank you for your contributions to my daily need for edification. It's all part of a game I like to play - to see if I can be a bit smarter today than I was yesterday.

How we evaluate and how we are evaluated is not unlike how Venture Capitalists sift through opportunities. When you are trying to raise money for a start-up the first thing investors look for is a reason not to invest. They don't look at what you may have that can be world-class, or why you may be able to unseat the champ; they look for a reason to dump you and move on.

I think we do the same thing to people, companies, and products. If I don't hate it maybe I'll grow to like it. This is why I think we do need to look at our weaknesses. We need to try to tone then down.

Grazie per i pensieri!

[deb schultz]

wait -- does that mean I am full of life or represent the finite..I am confused - or maybe just a bit tipsy from drinks with friends..;)

[mvellandi]

I like to play puzzles, thankfully a finite game.

"as we grow, we become more of who we already are"...that sounds pretty zenish to me, like 'Wherever you go, there you are'. Everyone has the inner seed of enlightenment potential; it's something we can awaken to over time or in little glimpses.

Anyways, glad to be a reader and fan!

[Valeria Maltoni]

Tom -- I'm totally on board on the idea of bringing our gifts to fruition. My curiosity centers on the thought that we choose what to talk about and how to do it.

Mike -- it was a very enjoyable reading, one of those rare books that inspire you to look at things differently.

Roger -- I see the work as service, thank you for recognizing it. VCs, employers, potential mates all look at your story: is it consistent with their view of the world? Does it match *their* desire for validation? We got used to working with weaknesses... yet that is not what it's about, not really.

Deb -- definitely full of life and promise for the future of social media.

Mario -- what a precious thought you contribute. I was listening when the lesson on "we see the world as we are" was being taught. And we found another point of departure for a conversation.

[Lewis Green]

Finally, I am a noun. Great post Valeria. To me building relationships is our calling and our lifeblood. Without them we are but islands barely visible to the naked eye.

[Roger von Oech]

Fun stuff.

[Ryan Karpeles]

"Power is concerned with what has already happened; strength with what has yet to happen. [...] Power is finite in amount. Strength cannot be measured."

What an awesome quote. Too many large companies get caught up in their power. Small companies usually focus on their strengths. Is it any wonder, then, why small is the new big?

[Bob Glaza]

My goodness, Valeria - thank you so much for your consistent and provocative reflections. I must echo Mario - wherever you go, there you are (a delightful book by John Kabat-Zinn). The message you spread is always full of hope. I LOVE that it embraces the playful nature of our humanity. Something to always remember!

[Terry Starbucker]

Valeria, love this link approach (thanks, by the way)! I'm curious - how did I get "game"? Well done. All the best!

[Valeria Maltoni]

Lewis -- you have been a noun in my book from the beginning.

Roger -- you really kicked it into gear with your proverbs.

Ryan -- and people, let's not forget people get caught in the game as well. There is only so much power to go around... strengths are built over time. Yes, I loved that image.

Bob -- good thing that we do remember to be playful. Thank you for your kind words.

Terry -- you're always a good sport. What was interesting for me to realize is that many of the words available where the same for links to different people. Each makes sense in a slightly new light.

[Becky Carroll]

Thanks for the playful link love, Valeria! It was fun to read through. The book sounds great, too, so thanks for sharing in this way.

I am so pleased with all the new relationships that have been formed for me since Mack started the Z-list in December. This is a great community, and I am honored to be a part.

[Valeria Maltoni]

When I saw Paul's and Roger's posts I wondered how to come up with a fun way to thank many of my readers over time.

What you write about managing the customer experience and the correct use of the term "management" resonates with my belief that we are often throwing words around before we stop and think about the consequences. Brava!

[CK]

We spoke of this book a few weeks ago and I definitely need to carve out some time and focus on it. I love your many words of wisdom and better understand the benefits of the infinite game.

Also really love this quote: "Education leads toward a continuing self-discovery; training leads toward a final self-definition."

Thank you for showing us the many joys and rewards of a true conversation (and enjoy your July 4th!)