Next week as you get hit by that bus, will you be thinking about the canoli you didn't eat?
That's why whenever I go back to Italy I have a list of the best pasticcerie (and gelaterie) to visit for mid-morning coffee or a delightful dinner with my mother.
Regrets can make us bitter. (yes, I do see the pun)
As you go through your day, do you make decisions in the moment, do you ask yourself Is this is what you want to be doing right now? Or are you already projected well into the future (or worse, regretting yesterday's choices).
Another way of looking at familiar things in a new way is to look at them to see and experience them.
The question popped into my head as I was listening to one of the last lectures Nora Ephron gave at the free library in Philadelphia. You can listen to the podcast here (stay tuned during question time. She is every bit as funny and wise as during her prepared remarks.)
Why this is a good question for business
Chances are, there are plenty of tasks you end up not missing at the end of the day.
You know, program your tweets so you can sound authentically staged and forget all about it while you go ahead and make more important spreadsheets. (hey, I've been there)
Of course you should make efficient use of time and prepare for your days. That's not what I'm saying here. While you were doing that, did you remember to read and listen when a person reaches out to you and to open the door for them?
There's a conversation going on right now about social networks the outcome of which is best summed by Frank Eliason in @YourService.
Why have things gone so far in an unproductive direction? Scarcity mindset? Fighting for bread crumbs when we could be making the pie bigger for everyone by developing the opportunity to connect and keep business promises?
Make a list of things you can contribute with your smarts and when thinking for yourself and then operate from that list. Jane Jacobs from my earlier post said something incredibly simple and yet so hard to do. In our gut we know when we're being appropriate and when we step over the line.
Being considerate and respectful is a best practice in being human and in the moment. That's where the most opportunity to connect and develop relationships is. Every single time I've held judgment until I could respond and not react I thanked myself for it.
That something we forget to do is look at the other person with the same consideration we reserve for ourselves. It is every bit as material to our development and enjoyable all the way to the core as eating that fresh pastry or gelato. (more, actually. It was the photo from the spring that made me pine for a canolo siciliano)
Nora Ephron highly recommends having Meryl Streep play you. I second that. It would be incredible to see someone so immersed in the character that it feels more real than your day was.
Valeria is an experienced listener. She is also frequent speaker at conferences and companies on a variety of topics. To book her for a speaking engagement click here.
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